Thursday, August 23, 2007

Introduction and Disclaimersss

Welcome to my Internet Ranting Site. I refuse to call this a "blog", because one of the things I hate is annoyingly trendy, yet not-even-so-clever web lingo. So from now on my site will go by the affectionate name of the IRS.

This is a new place for me to vent my frustrations and rants about the world and the 99.9% of stupid people who live in it. My decision to start Internet-ranting began a few weeks ago, when I noticed there were several things I was pissed about, but wanted to remain silent for fear of sounding like a raving bitch. I then realized I can use the Internet to vent, without my friends having to experience my frustration first hand and then chiding me for not taking precautions against high blood pressure. Instead of bitching as usual about the swarm of crying children at the aquarium and the woman who toasted my bagel when I clearly asked her not to, I can now channel my frustrations into writing.

That being said, I am not a writer. I have a B.A. in Astrophysics, which means that I know very complicated math and the entire Greek alphabet as represented in Physics equations. However, this does not by any means make me a good writer, nor does it enable me to write creatively. Please don't criticize me for lack of symbolic rhetoric or sentences which sound like they belong in lab manuals.

Additionally, I find the need to declare that I am not in any way a miserable bitch who hates the world, as may not be so evident from the majority of my posts. Those of you who know me will know that I am a generally happy and easy-going person who loves life, but who at the same time happens to get caught up on the doings of idiots. I am not sure why this is; I certainly don't have anger issues or anything of the sort. Perhaps it's that I think idiots make things complicated, and being such an intelligent person, it's hard to understand why things don't run as smoothly and efficiently as they could in the world. Regardless of the reasoning, it usually follows that once I get the chance to go off on my annoyances, I calm down pretty quickly.

The title of my rantings, of course, is self-explanatory. It also happens to be a slight play on the title of one of my favorite Bob Dylan songs, The Man in Me. If you know me, you know that I love snakes. Snakes, as you may also know, can get ridiculously angry at even the slightest hint of a threat. They usually hiss at their enemies to warn them of danger before striking violently. These posts are metaphorical strikes, complete with much hissing. I like to think that everyone has a little snake in him.

The inspirations for my rantings are the craigslist New York City rants and raves section, and the few friends I have who are very like-minded. You know who you are.


A Lil' Irish Lass said...

Welcome to the addiction. Ssssssss...

Hilary said...

1) How did you not tell me you have an internet ranting site?

2) No, you aren't that person, but *I* am definitely a miserable bitch who hates the world. But that's why you like me.

3) Marty would like to point out that he has a little snake, not inside him, but in his pants.